


Half His Height

by gravitality



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Kakusei | Fire Emblem: Awakening
Genre: F/M, M/M, Male My Unit | Reflet | Robin, Not Beta Read, One-Sided Love, Unrequited Love, but im still sad i made a male mu i want to marry frederick, could be female mu thought but i intended it to be male mu, everyone except for frederick is mentioned in passing, i havent finished awakening cut me some slack, just slapped this boy on ao3, one-sided on robin's end
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-23
Updated: 2019-05-23
Packaged: 2020-03-09 22:15:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,203
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18926068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gravitality/pseuds/gravitality
Summary: Robin's in love with Frederick. Frederick's apparently found someone else. Robin isn't quite sure how to act about that.





	Half His Height

It was rough, in the beginning. He was wary of me, I was wary of him - it didn’t foreshadow a very amicable relationship. That obviously changed as times went on. War tends to do that. As of now, he’s one of my closest friends, and I would protect him with my life. 

I plan to. Not that he knows that. 

He was… well, everything, I guess. Gallant. Tall. Polite. Understanding. Strong. Witty. He easily became one of my pillars. In a strange nation with things changing all the time and no real memories of, well, anything, he brought a sense of stability to my life. Along with others, of course. This could be said of all of the Shepherds, but… it fits with him. He’s the only one I feel comfortable describing this way. 

It’s no wonder I fell in love with him. 

During our travels, I more often than not played matchmaker. People trusted me to listen to their woes, crushes included, and I trusted myself enough to set them up. It always worked out. By the end of our journey, almost everyone had found someone. I had, too, I just hadn’t told him. I was planning to, I really was, just… after everything happened. If I was still alive. I thought it’d give him more time to digest it that way, and that’d it’d be better for the both of us. After all, it’s not too common in Ylisse for a man to be romantically interested in another man. I didn’t want to make him uncomfortable on the battlefield. 

My plans soon changed. 

He came to me one night, a few weeks before our final battle. Before the climax. And informed me that he had found someone of his own. He thanked me for introducing him to her, and I told him that it was no big deal. He asked me to help plan their wedding after the war. I agreed. What kind of friend would I be if I had said no? He and Sumia made a great pair, too. No one could deny that. Not even I could. 

I hadn’t even noticed them bonding. I felt like a terrible person for purposely ignoring Frederick’s own romantic interests for myself, unconsciously or not. I still did it. I never told him that. What did I tell him that night? I held his hands gently in mine, and happily told him that he’s one of the most important people to me, and that I’d be happy to aid him in any way, shape, and form. The smile he gave me in response is one I’ll treasure forever. He thanked me again and bid me good night before leaving my tent. I remained standing for a few more moments before collapsing onto my cot. I didn’t allow myself to cry. 

Over the next few weeks, I debated over whether I should still tell him. He had the right to know, I thought, I’m going to die anyway, I thought, there’s no reason for me to not tell him, I thought. But then that’s selfish, I thought, I shouldn’t cause turmoil between him and Sumia, I thought, I shouldn’t make my last words to him a confession he can’t respond to, I thought. 

As the final day approached, I grew more and more antsy. Chrom, Lissa, Libra, Frederick, Olivia, all of them, they all grew more and more concerned with my behavior. I was avoiding all of them. Every one. 

He entered my tent again the night before the day of reckoning. He asked me if I was alright. I told him I was simply stressed, that it’ll all go away tomorrow after we win. He didn’t seem convinced. He told me I could talk to him about anything, that he would never bring down judgement against me. Not anymore. I shook my head. It was fine, I insisted, there’s nothing to worry about. He hovered for a while longer, before dismissing himself. Impulsively, I turned towards him before he exited. He paused, and closed the tent flap, coming towards me again. 

I told him I had something to tell him, actually. He waited patiently. We stayed in silence. The patience he had was absolutely a virtue, and I was reminded again of all of his beautiful, amazing traits. 

Quickly. All of this was quick, quick as an arrow, quick as his horse, quick as his words - I apologized, said I was sorry, I took advantage of our friendship, took advantage of his kindness, and fell in love with him. I was sorry for telling him this, for possibly making things awkward with Sumia, for possibly making things awkward on the battlefield, but that I had to tell him. I apologized again for good measure, and bowed my head, feeling tears build. 

He was silent. I was silent. I couldn’t look at him. I felt a hand on my shoulder, but I refused to move. I couldn’t look at him. He spoke. His voice was calm. He said he was surprised, that this had caught him off guard, but that he was fine with it. He reminded me that he loved Sumia, and he apologized to me that he couldn’t make me happy. Something broke in me. I started crying. I grew angry - how dare he apologize to me, when I’m the one who messed up and overstepped the boundaries? I looked up at him, and the sad look in his eyes brought me back down. 

He reassured me. It was alright, we’d always be friends. He’d never push me away. He joked that he’d help me find someone who could make me happy in a way he couldn’t. I merely looked at him. I was unsure, uncertain, unconfident. My manners told me to thank him, and I did so. I forced a smile onto my face, telling him that I’d like to see whatever man he could find. I knew that none could ever stand half of his height, but I dared not say that. He looked reassured, now. He bid me goodnight again, after ensuring that I was alright, and left my tent. 

I remained standing another few moments before, again, collapsing onto my cot. I didn’t deserve to be friends with him, I didn’t deserve to know him, I didn’t deserve to look at him. I didn’t deserve anything. I decided that I was wrong. Chrom could stand half his height. Libra could, Lon’qu could, Donnel could - almost every man could, I thought. Except me. No matter how hard I tried to make up for this blunder, I doubt I ever could. I’d be glad to even stand an inch to the man he is. 

Maybe I should be glad that he fell in love with Sumia. 

Maybe I should tell him that I don’t want to help him plan his wedding. 

Maybe I should tell him that I won’t be around to even see his wedding. 

Maybe I should tell him that I’ll miss him. 

I fell asleep late that night, thinking of him again, of my Great Knight, of the perfect retainer, of Frederick, knowing that, after tomorrow, I’d get as much sleep as I could ever need.

**Author's Note:**

> i havent finished awakening but i love frederick & im extremely sad that i made a male mu so here's this sad boy piece about him


End file.
